Run its Course Pt 3 (I Ain't Sorry)

In my absence, I’ve had questions wondering when I would return to the Blog. There were times I wondered if my blog hadrun its course. BUT….my creative writing class, reminded me that I have more things to write about! The only way I will be successful is to continue to make it fun for me. Because when it’s not fun for me, it comes off as not genuine and when I’m not genuine, I’m not keeping it 100. 

So with that being said, let me do what I do best. About a month or so ago, I was ready to give up on any friendship that didn’t hold a current “active” status in my life. And I wasn’t fucking with new friendships either. I had become a pessimist. But my husband said something that put me in check. I haven’t made a huge effort to be a part of anyone’s life. But I also felt like it wasn’t reciprocated. So I decided I wanted to rebuild certainfriendships again. The people I used to go out with, let’s go! You wanna do lunch? If I’m not broke, let’s go lol. Let’s go get this mani and pedi!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I’m just tired of the “let’s get together” and then it doesn’t happen. I’m tired of being someone’s listening ear for the juice and drama in their life, but when shit all good, my phone got desert dick. I will make time for those who make time for me and who wants to put in effort. I don’t need to hang out every day, but for fucks sake, once a month isn’t unrealistic. I actually did a test, I had a friend I was reaching out to every morning, and every morning we’d chat back and forth. Then I wondered, would these morning chats happen if I don’t initiate??? So I stopped. That was a month ago, she hasn’t written me yet. And we live so damn close, it stupid ridiculous.

Another thing… why is it that when you have friends you meet at work; the bond seems so strong that you could be friends FOREVER. But when you no longer work together it’s like……..**crickets**** Damn you change your number and don’t give to me. How could we have “loved” each other like we say? How could we have meant that much to each other, if we don’t care to try? Was Convergys/Citi/ADT/AT&T our only connection? I don’t know…maybe so….who knows…

What I do know is…I want real people around me. My life is transitioning into the next phase of my life. And I want like-minded people around me. People with goals and love to livelife. I should be able to go to the movies and concerts with my friends, not just my husband. I’m not here to cry friend, let a bitch vent. lol I realize some people aren’t meant to be there for certain season in your life. And I’m fine with that, I just don’t wanna give up on friendships prematurely. Because I’m too old to be talking about “It ain’t nothing to cut that bitch off!” lmao. I’m too grown for that bullshit. 

I love the people in my life right now, I just want the RIGHT people in my life… and that’s me keeping it 100!