Young and the Restless

It's 5:38AM, and I'm sitting here in the dark thinking about how I'm going to compose this Blog. This week, like the last, has flown by pretty quickly. Homework is thick as ever, and I scratched another female off of my concert bucket list this week. I saw Janet Jackson's Unbreakable Tour! The concert was ok, but it was really a watered down Janet experience. There was no T & A AT ALL!!! And y'all know Janet be half naked on stage. Her production is usually out of this world...it was literally the Come Together Day of Janet concerts... But all in all, it was a moment in time I'll never forget and one that I enjoyed with my husband! This week also brought on the Fall Equinox and the start of the Fall lineup television shows. Empire, Scandal, Vampire Diaries, and Nashville are just a few that I am excited to return! -NO SPOILERS!-  lol Anyway, I write a lot for the grown and sexy crowd, but this week I'm reaching out to my young adults. When I was 18, I thought everything was going to be easy for me. My thought process was I have my job, get an apartment, have my car and live life just as I would as if I was staying with my mom. Well of course, life happened and that wasn't he case. And everyone older know how it was. You can't tell an 18 year old NOTHING! More and more they think they are ready to take on the world and with a companion by their side, they feel invincible. Here are some things I would want my younger readers to keep in mind...

Establish Strengths and Weaknesses: I say this because no one is perfect. No ONE person can do EVERYTHING. If they could they wouldn't need to be in a relationship. No matter how "independent" you are, you have to learn to lean on your partner. Identify what each other are good at and play on those things. I myself am not the greatest at balancing bills. So that is something I let my husband take care of, even from the get go. It doesn't make you weak or a bad partner, it is identifying what you are good at and what the other person is good at and finding a balance in your relationship. So you can have a successful one. Things will go more smoothly when each person stays in their lane and plays their position. Which brings me to my next topic...

Communicate: I can't say it enough. Talk. Talk. Talk. When you are young everything is fresh and new to you. There are so many things in life you have not experienced yet. Living life as a young couple isn't just about working and playing house. You have to talk to each other. Tell each other in respectful ways what is bothering you. I myself have a problem with this. I prefer to communicate through writing, but I have to break out of that. If you're feeling unappreciated, tell your partner. If things seem one-sided, tell them. Open mouths don't get fed...

Plan: If you move in with your partner, things should be established earlier on in the relationship. How will money be done. Will things be split 50/50? Who will be responsible for what? This is based off individual situations, but no one should feel like they are doing more than the other. Talk about your bills, discuss who will pay what, how much money goes into food. Things like that. Both should agree and stick to their arrangement and go from there. If you clash, find a medium that works for both of you.

Boundaries: Young adults jump so quickly into relationships now a days, they forget to set boundaries with each other. Let it be known what will be tolerated and what will not. If you need your own space and time, make that known so it is not an issue later on. How will it be when you have friends over? When you go out, will you want it to be a couples thing or a friends only thing. When these things are agreed upon in the beginning, it makes it hard to be challenged later.

And just be fair to one another. All these things above go hand and hand. Be there for each other and motivate each other. If the person you're with doesn't push you to maximize your potential, then you may have to ask yourself...why am I here? And even though this is for my young adults, these same principles can be applied to anyone starting a new relationship or moving in with their partners. Age means nothing when it comes to the fundamentals of a relationship. It's just if you're mature enough to handle the responsibility that comes with a serious relationship. And that's for anyone at any age. And above all...if you take nothing else away from this... make sure to keep it 100! lol