I Am Changing

It is 1:40AM and I am sitting here enjoying the last bit of my no school work before Fall Semester begins Monday. My husband and I have recently taking a liking to the Starz show 'Power'. What's amazing is not just the main story line, but the sub-stories and meanings as well. (Spoilers for those who haven't seen it) In the show, Omari Hardick plays a character named Ghost. Now without giving away the premise, he has people around him who have been down with him since childhood and teenage years. Or what some may refer to as, Day 1 Friends! lol Now, the problem comes in at the fact they all expect him to be the same person he was not only when they met him but over the years. No matter how much his life changes and he desperately wants change, everyone around him wants him to remain that same person from the "back in the day". (Didn't give too much away, trust me there is SO much more to the story for those who haven't seen it, go watch, it's a must see!) Now, I bring this up to say now a days people keep saying, No new friends. I'm down with my day 1! I disagree. Because ultimately you out grow some people. Have you ever had that one friend or friends that you've known for years upon years and they still expect the same things from you that you've did when you were teenagers and early 20s. Now it may be cute for some to parade around saying, Oh I'm the same me, nothing has changed. Well I'm sorry, but that is sad. I look at myself 10 years ago, and even 5 years ago and I am not the same person. I view the things around me differently and even want different things. I have experienced different things, different cultures, furthered my education and I just like preferences have grown. A lot of my superficial and immature views about life have well...evolved. And that is not a bad thing. It is healthy to expand yourself out of your own bubble. Now when I say you "out grow" people, I'm not saying that to say, I'm better than someone or more advanced. I say that to say we are on two different levels. I am a married, college educated, late 20s man. The way I carry myself, my views on education, the importance of stability, it all is a representation of me and who I am. Don't get me wrong, I'm still Chris, I'm still goofy, ditsy, and fun, but my priorities have shifted. Sometimes I long for the conversation of someone with the same struggles as me. College education, wanting to buy a house, building a family, securing a future, preparing for a career, possibly moving out of state...So when you say, no new friends, I'm like to hell with that, please let me find a new friend, someone who can relate to my current situation, someone who can appreciate me as I am today.I'm not saying completely diss and dismiss your old friends or that I don't love my friends, because I do, each and every one of them, but not a one of them I can talk to about the stress of finals and making sure I'm taking the right classes for my degree. Only a serious couple of them I can talk to about wanting to buy a house and making sure it is the right fit for my family, only one or two I can talk to about marriage. So when my husband asks me am I excited for Fall Semester and taking classes on campus, YES, I want to meet more college educated individuals to share my passions and struggles with. When I say I am changing, it is because I am. And I don't believe it is in a negative way, I'm just growing up. For the first time in my life, I really have a grown state of mind. And I just want that for those around me. And you should too. If you surround yourself with negative people or people that aren't happy in their own situations, what do YOU think the outcome of that is? You should want people around you who will feed into your future and bring something positive and productive. You should want people around you who sees you for who you are and see the positive glow you have about you. Just wanting someone to relate to.  But not every change is your fault for not being relatable. For instance, my best friend is experiencing the joys and (sometimes not so joyous days) of motherhood. Now I can't even begin to comprehend what it is like to round up a toddler and an infant and still try to maintain a social life. I say I get it and understand but to her I'll never truly understand until I become a parent. And there's nothing wrong with that, but I'm sure she too or used to want someone to talk to who is a parent/mother that can relate.  Anyways back on topic, doesn't it get tiresome when you have so much going on for yourself and then someone comes around and judges you off of the shit you USED to do. But it's not their fault, will it is actually, they just haven't grown enough in their own lives to be able to comprehend the level you're on right now, and that's keeping it 100!